Joseph Smith, the founder and prophet of the Mormon religion, had this to say about our fair state:
"The murders at Haun's Mill, the exterminating order of Governor Boggs, and the one-sided rascally proceedings of the Legislature, have damned the State of Missouri to all eternity."
This quote originated from the Haun's Mill massacre when Missouri ordered a militia to exterminate a group of Mormon settlers. Missouri has only one speed and its set to "intense." These words are particularly damning when you realize that Smith also identified Independence, Missouri (the one-time Meth capital of the world) as the "center place." You know, where Jesus would return.
Is anyone surprised by this? Missouri being damned for all eternity? I mean Smith might have been on to something. If our roadways and other failed initiatives are any example, maybe all Missourians are cursed. Even worse, the only president from Missouri was the only president to use nuclear weapons. Our college has been host to a number of unsavory characters.
Missourians don't stand a chance.
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